How To Disappear Completely
I am still here for now
How do you disappear without drama? I think I finally figured it out in 2017. What was the secret? I couldn’t tell you. I know that I somehow unlocked it. Over the years, I have periodically dropped off the Internet for months at a time. People have taken that to mean that something dramatic or nefarious has happened to me. While I will tell real people I know in my everyday life, for obvious reasons, I don’t feel the need to notify the Internet that I’ve decided to retreat from technology to a place in the wilderness, away from cell phones and computers. I think that some people lack any excitement in their lives, and so drum up drama online to fill their emptiness with a passion play, which is more about them receiving attention and not about me at all.
Anyway, in 2017, I decided to live out a boyhood fantasy. I had grown up reading authors like Jack London (among others), and at least once, I wanted to work the Salmon season in Alaska. So, to make a long story short (for now), I signed up to work the sockeye season in Naknek, Alaska. Once the season was complete, I signed up as a communications technician on a vessel heading to the Arctic Circle to study methane levels related to climate change. All in all, I spent 8 months in the north, most of which I was out of range of cell phones and casual Internet connectivity. That trip gave me the mental space to conjure the elements necessary for the creation of The Liminal Cycle.
When I returned to the lower 48, no drama was awaiting me, which is nice because I instantly started writing Liminal, so who had time or even the inclination to deal with people and their pathetic need for dramatic antics? Again, I have no idea why I didn’t come back to rumors and drama surrounding my absence. I have theories that this is mainly due to the elimination of certain types of people from my life. Anyway, I have friends who frequently disappear from my life. I don’t run around and raise false alarms that would be more about my need for attention than any genuine concern I have for them. We reunite when they are ready to, and I don’t intrude. They’re adults, and I respect their boundaries. Dropping off the Internet is a healthy thing to do, and if you decide to do it, you owe NO ONE an explanation. Do I need to say this? THE INTERNET IS NOT REALITY. There, I said it. Part of running wild and free so that the muses can communicate unfettered is not being obligated to report in to anyone, much less some person on the Internet that you don’t really know. Run wild, run free, my child!
Am I saying this because I’m thinking of dropping off the Internet again? Maybe. If I do it’s because I’ve gone on a retreat to receive a new story, and I’ll be back when and if I am ready. I encourage all of you to take a mental health holiday when and if you can. Do something drastic, even if your so-called friends can’t cope. If they can’t, consider getting new friends.
Invention on Mubi
From an interview-
CH: The most surprising insight I found was in terms of examining the concept of ‘conspiracy’ itself. I was pretty heavily researching things like ‘Ong’s Hat,’ which was one of the first well-known internet-based conspiracy theories.
Invention On MUBI
Love this from the AMA:
Callie: Fun Fact -- no one knew it was a Blair Witch remake until we were already attached. To be honest, I did not understand how we were supposed to recreate one of the most conspiratorial films of all time, especially since such a huge part of why the original was so terrifying was due to the fact that there was all this folklore around it. Ong's Hat was a reference for INVENTION when we first started to explore the conspiratorial themes in the film. I weirdly feel like there are a lot of similarities between Ong's Hat and the origin stories of how the original Blair Witch came to be...
https://www.reddit.com/r/movies/comments/1lx8haf/comment/n2lq9st/
An Old Flyer and Some Old Memories
In 1993, I produced the after-party for the Bicycle Day celebration. Unfortunately, I lost a significant portion of my collection of flyers and photos due to water damage. Someone was kind enough to send me a pic of the flyer for this event.
In Grant Morrison’s book Super Gods (2011), he mentions being at this party. I didn’t meet him, and at that time, I only knew of Grant because I admired the graphic novel Arkham Asylum. This was before The Invisibles. I am a very picky comic reader, so Akrham appealed to me in part because I liked the story and in part because the artist was Dave McKean. Dave was familiar to me because of his work on album covers such as David Sylvian’s Gone to Earth. Pro tip: This album is an excellent choice for your soundtrack on a psychedelic journey.
Anyway, that show was legendary, and for a few years after, people would see me on the street and stop to tell me it changed their life. Probably because the show itself was fantastic, and also because the daughter of a legendary LSD maker showed up and passed around “sacrament” free to all. By the time Crash Worship took the stage, people were in various states of undress and, um, multiple states of intimate union. (heh)
Assault on Culture
People often ask me for a list of my artistic influences, and although the following is far from complete, a good starting point is, of course, Ong’s Hat: COMPLEAT, as well as Stewart Home’s The Assault on Culture. You can find it used as a print book in lots of places or as a PDF at the wonderful Monoskop. Also, check out Monoskop’s full collection.
Wasteland – An Appreciation of DC’s Forgotten 1980s Horror Anthology Series
I discovered this series in the 80s when I saw Timothy Leary at Cross Currents in Chicago, and Del Close invited himself on stage to hawk his new comic series. Want to read a comic where people like Robert Anton Wilson, Timothy Leary, and Philip K. Dick (to name a few) appear as characters? Look no further. Available in digital format these days and rumored to be around on free platforms, Wasteland stands the test of time.
Really enjoyed this post. My preference for longish periods offline goes back to before internet, ironically. I had a thing about "media-free zones" which I recommended and wrote about in my old Anxiety Culture zine (a little article about periodically completely avoiding newspapers, TV, radio, etc, which could equally apply to internet, but before the online/offline dichotomy. Goes on about William Burroughs's notion of "word virus" as I recall. Now we have far worse... the dreaded algorithm!).
Dave Mckean art - seen his amazing cubist version of the female robot in Metropolis? Didn't know he did artwork for 'Gone To Earth' (loved that album, btw - haunting atmospheric sound, and it even has Bill Nelson featuring!).
"To each their own in their own time of awakening."
Disappear and then reappear in and out and all around ones own holodeck.
(d)